


Let Me Count the Ways

by mcgarrygirl78



Series: Coming Around Again [2]
Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Drama, F/M, Family, Friendship, Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-06
Updated: 2014-10-06
Packaged: 2018-02-20 02:03:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2410907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I want to see this story through because it’s more incredible with each passing chapter.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Let Me Count the Ways

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry for not being at all linear with this series, but I just write them as they come to me.

Emily lay in bed staring at the ceiling. She could see the shadows of rain streaking down the picture window. The house was quiet and Jason was sound asleep beside her. She turned to look at him; fought the urge to touch him. He was so beautiful when he slept. She smiled, taking a deep breath.

 

“Jason? Jason, are you awake?”

 

He grumbled without moving or opening his eyes. Emily reached out to stroke his chest.

 

“Jason?”

 

“Hmm,” his eyes slowly opened. “What's the matter?”

 

“I need to talk to you. Are you awake?”

 

“I plead the fifth.” He mumbled. “What's the matter?”

 

Emily was silent as Jason woke more. He adjusted his eyes to the darkness and studied her. Covering his mouth, he yawned.

 

“Emily? Sweetness, c'mon, what's bothering you?”

 

“I'm so hormonal.” She tried to hold it in but the tears came anyway. Emily hated to cry. While she and Jason had the conversation more times than she could count, she still considered them a sign of her weakness. Some lessons could never be unlearned.

 

“Hey, hey,” Jason pulled her into his arms, kissing her salty cheeks. “This is certainly a logical argument for nature versus nurture. You’ve adopted an infant and your hormone levels spike.”

 

She smiled. The adoption had been finalized for a week. Nine month old Lavinia Elizabeth Gideon was legally their daughter. For Emily it seemed as if the day would never come. The process was longer than a year for them and multiple years for other couples she knew. Surely her name and their money made it easier though it was far from a picnic. At least now Emily wouldn’t be looking over her shoulder, waiting for the day someone came to take her daughter away. The 60 days between the signing of the paperwork and the legalization were tough on the couple. They faced much heartache in their quest to have a family.

 

“We’ve been through so much.” She whispered.

 

“It’s only made us stronger.” He replied.

 

“I know.”

 

“So tell me why you're awake at…what time is it?”

 

“I'm not telling you.” Emily said.

 

“That bad, huh?” Jason laughed, pulling her closer to him. “If you don’t want to talk, we don’t have to talk. If you just woke me up to look into that beautiful face of yours, you're not going to hear a peep of complaining from me.”

 

“Sometimes you're amazing,” she sighed, resting her forehead on his chest.

 

“Only sometimes?” he grinned, rubbing her raven hair. 

 

“Mmm, I love you.”

 

“I love you too, Katya, and we’re going to be happy. It’s been a journey; it will remain a journey but I'm here for the long haul. I want to see this story through because it’s more incredible with each passing chapter.”

 

“I'm pregnant, Jason.”

 

“What?”

 

“I'm pregnant.”

 

“Really?” his voice quaked and he cleared his throat. “When…?”

 

“I found out a couple of days ago. I really thought it was stress; I was so damn worried that things would fall through with Fin. I missed my cycle but I thought it was stress.”

 

“What convinced you otherwise?”

 

Emily looked at him. She took his face in her hands, giving him Eskimo kisses.

 

“I just knew. I bought a pregnancy test and I took it. When that line showed up I called my OBGYN…I wasn’t going to say a word to you without talking to her first.”

 

“How far along are you?” Jason tenderly touched her stomach. He could feel the butterflies.

 

“Thirteen weeks.”

 

“You're out of the first trimester already?”

 

“Yeah,” she nodded. “I want to be excited, but…”

 

“I know.”

 

“You don’t.”

 

“I don’t?” he asked.

 

“Jason, I was almost six months pregnant when I lost our first child. I never thought I would recover and then I got pregnant again and we were happy again. I thought I did everything right…”

 

“Neither of those miscarriages were your fault, Katya. Do you think you want to spend the next twenty something weeks waiting for the other shoe to drop?”

 

“I don’t know. I don't know if I can handle that pain again.”

 

“We’re in this together.” He said. “Always.”

 

Emily nodded, cuddling closer to him. Jason wrapped her in his arms and kissed her forehead.

 

“Fin is going to be a big sister.” He whispered. “You're going to be a mommy again.”

 

“Asking you to promise me is improbable, isn’t it?”

 

“Yes. Are you going to ask me anyway?”

 

“No.” she shook her head. “Just hold on to me.”

 

“That will not be a problem.”

 

Emily just breathed, clutching his back. This was good news; it should be good news. They had a little girl sleeping down the hall. She was beautiful and her mother was fascinated by her. She would be enough for all the happiness in the world. Now there was a chance to be a mother again. 

 

As a couple, she and Jason faced pain and loss at what should have been the most joyous time. Emily wasn’t sure if she could do it again. Yet here she was, pregnant. She could never see it as anything but a blessing. Praying was something she had not done in a very long time but she would say her prayers tonight. She would pray for baby Lavinia, pray for the baby she carried inside of her, and pray for the strength to walk down yet another road on this journey.

 

“Amen,” she whispered.

 

“Amen,” Jason repeated.

 

He wasn’t going to let fear get the best of him. He didn’t fear anything anymore. There would be more hard times, more storms; he’d been through too much to believe otherwise. Still he knew about hope. He looked into the eyes of his daughter and saw it. He saw it in the smile of the woman who never backed down from a challenge. He saw it in a relationship that was quickly becoming one of the most significant of his life. Jason was holding on, he would never let go, and they would see it through together.

 

***

                                                                                                                  



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